Monday, November 28, 2005

With Anna doing me a huge favor and taking Christmas out of my hands, it looks like New Years is once again mine. Last year's party was one to be remembered.... I had people who didn't even get invited, and barely know me, walk up and ask me about how badass my party of awsomeness..... was... This year, it shall happen again! HA HA HA HA HA!

It's going to be a BYOB party... If you want a certain drink made for you, just comment it and I will telly ou what you need to buy. For example, if you want to have a Kamikazee.... you will need Sweetened Lime Juice, Vodka, and Triple Sec.

If you want it, post it. I'll probably be making Kamikazees and Screwdrivers.... well, maybe Fuzzy Navels.

Anywho, I'm thinking on theming it. I'm open to suggestions on just about anything, so feedback would be appretiated. Maybe how to improve on what wasn't as good about last years, and so on.


posted @ 7:52 PM

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Tuesday, November 22, 2005
In the last week, I've been invited to try and out and be a model, got real drunk, bought a CD, and got a promotion-like thing at the hospital.

I went to watch a modeling show, and got invited to try out att the next audition by a cute judge. I told her I was ugly and clashed but she told me I was cute and had a style that would work. This made me happy. She even did a little ass sizzle. That boosted my overall confidence a tad.

Few days later, went with Alexei to finally see the movie and get drunk. Overrall, I think I ended on beer cup 22 and shot 17. Give this number + or - 3 or so. My number I think of varies, but I think this is the closest. I'm also glad my Kamikazee shots went over well. After party opinipns anyone? Anywho, the party rocked, and I'm glad I was a part of the movie. My drunken antics ranged from trashing Alex's bathroom, to staying up till 7:30 drinking with Joe and Cherie.

I got a call Sunday that I'll be moving a bit up for the third time in volunteer rank. I think this is the end of the road as far as responsibility goes without having a degree. I get my name tag soon, and a bit of insurance. What's new is my increase of time with patients.

Today I hung out with Ryan. We went to get his car fixed (took much longer then expected), and he also told me the school he works at might hire me... or at least have positions available and he will attempt to give me the hookup, so it all might just depend on my interview. After that, I came home, waiting till 11:40, and drove to Meijers to buy System of a Down's new CD, Hypnotize at midnight.

I'm on the second run through, it FUCKING ROCKS!


posted @ 12:44 AM

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Wednesday, November 16, 2005

EVER FEEL RETARDED!~>!>>!~

I DO AM HI!

TragicMind101: Once upon a time, in a small catholic dominant country town, lived a little boy named Fergus

TragicMind101: now you do a sentence

LastPlaceBassist: fergus didnt belong in this town, for he loved the taste of virgin hymen with lemmon sause

TragicMind101: he discovered this love when he was first put in a wheel chair by a homeless man who mugged him with a shoppic cart for crack at the supple age of 8

LastPlaceBassist: at the age of nine he married the local ostridge farmer and ran far far away to a place called iowa to open a giant ethnic hair care super store

TragicMind101: it was at this store he met the woman of his dreams, Garth Brooks, the local indian healer who was blessed with wonderful powers.

LastPlaceBassist: and these powers included meat vision and the ability to melt, there was now a super hero more useless than aquaman on the justice league

TragicMind101: but the real story was not in the powers of Garth Brooks, but in the child that spawned from his womb.... with the seed of Johnny inside.

LastPlaceBassist: johnny would grow up to be a powerful and ruthless leader of a band of nomads that would later over throw cuba

TragicMind101: and Garth Brooks had a sex change and became a country singer.... with wonderful powers.... and friends in low places (worked at the DMV).

LastPlaceBassist: johnny on the other hand wasnt as lucky as garth and fiedel came back to cuba with antonio banderez, oj simpson (in a pedator suit) and hummers that could float on water and had battering rams shaped like a phalus on the front, the battle only lasted before johnny was taked out, clockwork orange style

TragicMind101: and oj simpson murdered Garth after finding out he was a she at one point.... and the nigger community ran free with AIDS and huge cocks.

LastPlaceBassist: oj simpson had to go on the lamb for every butt fucking redneck was after him for killing their demi-god garth

TragicMind101: and the thunder rolled

LastPlaceBassist: after escapeing the red necks, oj dyed his skin to be as white as it could and started an emo band called "stab rip my sould rip stab stab"

TragicMind101: they had a song that reached number one called "I Killed Garth Brooks With A Sottering Iron And Ten Pounds Of Schmuck Jelly."

LastPlaceBassist: but oj refused to belive anyone liked him because he was an emo kid, and as everyone knows, emo kids suck cock so he jsut got on his livejournal and wrote more bullshit poetry

TragicMind101: eventually he wrote so much poetry, that John Mayer noticed him one night after crying and jacking off to pictures of himself taped to a mirror, and said:

LastPlaceBassist: holy shit, this guy is more of a pussy than walt whitman

TragicMind101: and Jonny criend and was just about to hang up.... but then he got the idea to call OJ..... Johnny wanted revenge on John "I have a vagina" Mayer.

LastPlaceBassist: johnny wanted to embarass john in the media but how? he already made the pussiest music there is next to motzart, and he was already sprouting vaginas on his face, but what could he do?

TragicMind101: then the light bulb clicked on.... He would put John Mayer in a concert band with himself., and have a Pussy-off contest.... biggest pussy wins.... O.J. vs. John Mayer

LastPlaceBassist: oj went on stage riding a sheep and had a daisy rock guitar in his hands, he barrowed a piano from liberaci. he also got elton john to personally make his out fit, he knew this was in the bag

TragicMind101: even after all the fag that as forced out of O.J., John Mayer proved to be a bigger pussy, so O.J., with revenge in hand.... said:

LastPlaceBassist: *with a list* jesus christ john why does it always come to this!? *tears flowing* I JUST WANT YOU IN ME!!!! IVE BEEN PLAYING HARD TO GET FOR YEARS!!!!"

TragicMind101: John yelled back, "I didn't know! I'm so sorry for all of this, I just wish I wish I would have saved my ass back in it's virgin days for you!"

LastPlaceBassist: at this point in time oj had given up, he ran home got out his box of patented emo razors and cut his wrists, but just for attention

TragicMind101: he tried to stem the blood, but all the NyQuil he drank kept him just a little tood runk to find the bandaids.... so he died in the fetal position... under the sink.

LastPlaceBassist: clutching a picture of john mayor, smothered in oj's favorite black lipstick

TragicMind101: and a cucumber rammed up his ass. THE END



posted @ 8:56 PM

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Grand Master Funk